Dr. Hapgood, your cruise director (hapgood) wrote,
Dr. Hapgood, your cruise director

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You're not in Kansas anymore, Homo

Lured to the theater by the promise of the hunky Collin Farell, I went to see The Recruit tonight. I didn'r realize that it would be a trip into an alternate universe, one where the theater seats are filled with testosterone-laden straight boys and their glassy-eyed dates instead of the diverse crowd I usually share the theater with.

Thank god for those boys in the audience, because the movie did nothing to showcase Collin's assets. Chick (and guys who are into dick) Flicks make concessions for straight men, offering up endowed women in tight clothing, and I don't see why action films can't deliver also. As far as I'm concerned, all action filmmakers should imitate The Big Hit and add in gratuitous workout and shirtless scenes where the cinematography is dedicated to giving the audience what they really paid for. I sure as hell didn't pay for the predictable plot line and Al Pacino acting both enigmatic and annoying in his role as THE MAN meets Big Brother!

Reasons this film did not appropriately showcase Collin Farrell in all his loveliness.
1. Where are his abs? One split second glimpse while he is removing a small manila envelope from the waistband of his sweatpants is just mean.
2. When shirtless, all shots of lead do not need to be tight shots of his face. We've seen his face! When the rest of the body was clothed!
3. Lighting. Washing him out in blue tones does nothing for his skin, what we got to see of it. If you are only going to show us a flash of skin, make him look sexy while you do it.

/rant (for now)

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