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Like gum on the bottom of a shoe

I feel like that right now. I just finished the letter to Laura telling her to pay me or else. I think I did a nice job of balancing the facts, an appeal to emotions and fairness, and the ultimate consequence of not paying me(eviction). There is no more grey area where our situation is concerned, it is all spelled out for her. I even gave her two payment plan options. I still feel like crap, though. I'm only asking for what she owes me; it's not like I'm adding interest or service charges. Finances are always a sensitive subject, I guess.

This is making me think about one of the lessons in A Course In Miracles(I'm working through it), I'm never upset for the reason I think. So why am I really upset now? The next lesson is I'm upset because I'm seeing something that isn't there(rough paraphrase). What isn't there? I feel like I'm so torn up because I don't feel like I deserve the money, like I'm somehow taking it from her. Can I make it through the semester if she doesn't pay me? Yes, I can squeeze by. But, without the ability to put some money away, how am I going to move to the great new job I get fresh out of graduate schooltm, or buy suits for interviews, and stuff like that? Will I just blow the money she pays me? Always a possibility.

In sort of related news, I just found out (in the middle of writing this) that apple is having a two day sale on the iPod that ends in just over 24 hours. 10% off! My graduation gift to myself just got cheaper. So, if you have a quote idea, now is the time to submit it.